please please please

let it be a week from now :(

I just want to go home.

I'm tired. I'm sad. I miss my friends.

I have a 10 page paper to write, ~3 pages about my group members for some dumb fake business proposal, a web portfolio to finish, two journal articles to edit, and a final to take. But after that, and work on Thursday and Friday, I'm done.

I went with Megan and Lauren to Modesto today so that Megan could try on wedding dresses. She looked gorgeous.
That along with Steffers being married with little CJ on the way, I'm pretty down right now. I feel like those are things that I want, and not having them is starting to get to me. I know that getting married and having a kid right now would make my life a lot harder, but shit. I can't make myself not want it, even if I know it isn't what's best.

I really like Taj. Like really like him. That scares the hell out of me, seeing as we have only been dating for two weeks, and don't know each other very well. I like the way I feel around him - he makes me realize that I need to not worry about things. I don't even notice that I'm doing it. But he'll call me out on it, and then I see that I need to let go, and do. It feels amazing. Only problem is we're never really going to see each other. He has 5+ years left of school, I have 3 myself. We are both working two jobs over the summer. Neither of us will have a whole lot of free time - and the only day I'll have off, he'll have to work. This will be an interesting few months. Along with this, I don't get to talk to him as often as I would like. I hope that it's just the end of the semester being crazy.

I'm worried about what to do with my life. Teaching is looking like it's the most likely of the lot right about now, but I don't know what to do to get there. I'm applying to Teach for America, but I get the feeling I won't get it. Which means either getting my teaching credentials, working, and then getting my Masters, or getting my Masters, then going to work. I don't know which to do, I have to go talk to career services.

I also don't know where I will go to do said schooling. I want to live in Louisiana for a while, but goodness knows if that will work. I would also like Oregon and Washington, and staying in California wouldn't be the end of the world.

Well, brain dump complete. Hopefully I can shove this all aside and finish my semester now.